すべらない話|ガダルカナル・タカ「新幹線・隣の太った人」

※人志松本のすべらない話 2014年1月11日放送分より

人志松本のすべらない話10周年突入スペシャル。

歴代MVSが全員集合し、
すべらない話を披露する。

ガダルカナル・タカのすべらない話
「新幹線にて・・・」

ガダルカナル・タカが、
新幹線」について語る。

ガダルカナル・タカが9月初旬の話で、
静岡で仕事を終え、
駅に向かうと酷い混雑ぶりであった。

話を聞くと、
集中豪雨の影響で、
新幹線が2時間遅れているという話であった。

そこで、
ガダルカナル・タカのマネージャーが、
状況把握を行い、
なんとか現状で移動出来る新幹線の席を抑えた。

但し、
いつもはガダルカナル・タカとマネージャーは、
隣り合って席に座っているが、
今日だけは離れるという話であった。

ガダルカナル・タカは、
知らない人と隣り合って座るのは苦手だったが、
状況が状況なだけに渋々了承した。

ガダルカナル・タカが、
実際に抑えられた席に向かうと、
そこには軽い不安を感じさせる、
席がパンパンに詰まるぐらいの、
太った人が隣に座っていた。

その人は、
ビールを片手に、
ノートパソコンを開いて、
何かを見ていた。

とはいえ仕方がないので、
ガダルカナル・タカはキャップを深めに被って、
なんとかその時間をやり過ごそうと考えた。

すると隣の人は、
ビールを一口飲んで、
小さなゲップをした。

そのゲップからは強烈な、
シュウマイ弁当を食べた後のニオイがした。

そんな感じが数回続いて、
ガダルカナル・タカは相手に聞こえるように、
咳払いでやめてもらうように合図をおくった。

しかし、
隣の人はそれを意に介さず、
同じ事を繰り返した。

すると、
ガダルカナル・タカはだんだんと腹が立ってきて、
隣の人の嫌な部分ばかりが目につくようになった。

イライラを一旦落ち着かせる為に、
ガダルカナル・タカはトイレへと向かい、
心を落ち着かせてから席へ戻った。

するとその太った人は寝ていた。

ガダルカナル・タカが、
開いたままのノートパソコンを覗くと、
そこにはYouTubeで下品な動画が流れていた。

ガダルカナル・タカは、
ゲップを人前で当たり前のようにする奴は、
下品な動画を見るんだなと思ったが、
よく見てみると、
その動画はたけし軍団の動画だった。

そこで、
ガダルカナル・タカは、
隣の人は自分がガダルカナル・タカだと、
気付いていた事を悟った。

するとガダルカナル・タカは、
今度は、
たけし軍団は寝るほどつまらないのかと、
別の意味でイライラしてきた事を明かした。

レビュー

人志松本のすべらない話」の過去放送回は、
DVDにまとめられていおります。

そして今回の話ですが、
公共の場でマナーが悪い人は、
新幹線に限らずどこにも存在しますよね。

もうこれに関しては、
個人的には、
苦情を言ってトラブルになるのはごめんですし、
ついてなかったと思い込むしかないと思います。

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